Thursday, April 10, 2008

Will Boys Ever Learn?

Did They All Go To The Same School Of Disrespect?

A few weeks ago I ran into a guy pal and his friend on a street corner, in front of a wine bar before a Greg Brown concert nearby. My friend introduced me to his friend, who immediately started passing out compliments - I looked fantastic, and I smelled good, and then they invited me to join them for a drink before the show.
I had to go to the box office to check on my tickets first, but told the guys I'd love to join them, and I'd be back in 5 minutes. I skipped off down the street, feeling pretty chipper. Guys never invite me for a drink.

Now, when I say 5 minutes, I don't mean 5 girl minutes, which is more like 20 minutes and involves the reapplication of makeup. I'm the kind of of girl who can go from dirty and disheveled to ready for a night on the town in 9 minutes flat. I've clocked myself. So when I say 5 minutes, I mean 5 minutes. 
But when I returned to the wine bar, 5 minutes later, they were nowhere to be found.
I stood in the middle of the wine bar, feeling sort of dumb. I waited around for a few minutes to see if they'd return, but they never did. So I left and went to the concert.
The next night I ran into my pal's friend at another establishment. 
He was sitting at a table with a familiar looking guy.
As I was preparing to leave, I approached the table, and asked my pal's friend what had happened to the two of them the night before.
He told me that the wine bar was so busy that they'd left and gone down the street to another bar. He told me that they'd asked the bartender to tell me where they'd gone, but of course, nobody told me anything. I chided him a bit for not waiting just a few minutes for me before leaving, because I thought I'd been ditched.
I said, "You know, it's bad manners to tell a girl she smells nice, invite her out for a drink, and then disappear on her."
He laughed, then pointed to the guy sitting next to him and said, "I learned everything I know from this guy."
I looked at his table mate. It was my Blind Date. You know. THE Blind Date.
"You know, I believe you," I scoffed. "Goodbye, fellas."